April 18, Entry 7
13:31
Morning in Deauville is a blistering playground. As we prepare for our brunch on the port, we come across the realization that every day on this road trip Mother Nature has blessed us with great weather. A small ladybug rests itself on my palm.
"Don't let it bite you, or you'll turn into Ladybugman."
"You're funny. What would be my power?"
Silence.
"Controlling women's periods."
"... Great."
Our day has just begun.
15:17
In Le Havre, we spend some time admiring the locals. The local architecture, I meant. A giant structure erects itself before us, and resembles a religious building, although much more sinister. From the inside, the immense central spire covered in stained glass illuminates our faces.
"Now THIS would make an awesome Unreal Tournament map".
The Estonian is dead-on. The gray walls filled with nooks and crannies, the symmetrical structures, and of course, the spiral staircase leading to the roof, where all the sniping can be executed.
"Can we go up there?", asks the American.
"I'll ask her.", I say, pointing at the gentle-looking cleaning lady.
_____
"So?"
"She says the building has never allowed tourists to go up there. For 'safety reasons'. Also, she described to me in awesome detail that in order to get up there, we'd have to climb a few staircases to get on the roof, then walk around the base of the tower, head back inside, climb the infinite staircase, and then reach another door leading to the top of the tower, where a beautiful view of the city can be seen."
"... Wow. That's stupid."
" I seriously have an urge to just parkour it and get on top", replies Georg.
"Dude, you should have told her we work for the government, and we're here to inspect the building", mentions the American.
"Or seduce her... sexually", mentions Siim with a slight grin.
I should have.
15:46
The temperature is staring to become unbearable. We head for the beach, as if pretending to swim would ease our burning skin. Summer in France has clearly gotten a head start.
"Uh-oh, I think your transformation has begun, Tudor. All these women tanning on the sand are feeling it.", says Laurent.
"If I'm Ladybugman, then all of us are called the Ladybug Boys. You guys can be my groupies, and we can start a break dancing group."
Ladybug Boys, assemble. We're heading for Etretat.
19:58
As we begin our final ascension, we each look back on the journey we've experienced and the locations we've visited. We've had brunch near St-Malo on a cliffed coast, scaled countless castle stairs on the Loire Valley, and feasted on delicious cheeses and wines.
As dinner locations go, the cliffs of Etretat are superior to each of these. Armed with chorizo and camembert from the local store and an emptying bag of Muscadet from the south of Nantes, we are transfixed by this commanding view.
An entire panorama of visual orgasm flows through us. Sleeping seagulls the size of small cars, a lonely painter on the beach below practising his passion near the crashing waves, all surrounded by a dying sun's rays piercing through the clouds.
"Powerful", utters the Estonian.
23:16
With another long day behind us, we enter our Premiere Classe hotel. Due to technical reasons, the automatic payment system seems to have forgotten to book us a second room, and thus, we receive no key. Tired and unfazed by this small inconvenience, we climb to our floor and open the first room. Since both rooms are connected by a locked door, and considering the fact that the size of our wallets has entered the "BROKE" zone, there is only one solution.
"Ok, everyone give me your Auberge de Jeunesse cards. I learned how to pick locks back home."
"You guys try, but I doubt this is going to work. I'm heading to the reception and paying", I respond with authority.
A few minutes later, as I am about to take out my credit card, my phone rings.
"WE'RE IN. GET UP HERE NOW."
This time, we're bad.
_______________
April 19, Entry 8
12:03
It was inevitable that we would get caught. However, it turns out hotel reception can be convinced the entire misunderstanding was their fault for not having adequate IT support.
The final result? A free room.
13:55
In town, we undergo our brunch ritual, in the midst of Rouen's populace. Later, after a few discussions about what to do next, the general consensus lies somewhere around "Let's just go home", "I'm tired", and "I need to shower" .
16:04
As our black stallion charges through heavy parisian traffic, we roll down the windows and re-acquaint ourselves with the familiarly-unattractive gray color of Velibs, the throat-tickling scent of petrol, and the majestic Arc de Triomphe.
It just so happens that the perfect tune is blasting from our vehicle onto the streets:
"Oh Hey, I've been travelin' on this road too long
Just tryin' to find my way back home
But the old me's dead and gone
Dead and gone"
Paris, we missed you.
The End
